some enchanted evening

currently listening to:
a reenactment of South Pacific with reba mcentire and alec baldwin on kcet. (not enjoying it much.)

i can't seem to remember what i did today other than going to mass and eating a lot. i think i might try taking some Ginkgo Biloba, just to see if it helps with my short term memory. i really wish i could remember the recent things of life, it would save me some time and my head wouldn't ache so much. and don't you hate it when you'll be walking somewhere to get something then when you finally get to where it's suppose to be you realize you don't remember what it is you were intending to get. yup, i believe that's happen to me about 21 times in the last 2 days. it's starting to bother me cuz i probably take that walk 3 times for the same object. so that technically means i've only been searching for 7 objects over the past 2 days. yes, i think i did my math right.

so life has been on the tougher side the past couple weeks. i thought my own thoughts were tough enough to deal with, but when you think about it that's never quite enough. i guess i'm a bit numb in that section or rather indifferent. it's like frances said, "you don't have emotions." maybe i do, maybe i don't, or maybe they are just really screwed up. either way i have been indifferent and it's only at those few moments when i get a lil teary eyed or get angry. that's partially why i haven't blogged in awhile. i just didn't want to because i felt like anything i would type would most likely be negative or "emo." but now i'm indifferent, so typing stuff down is not so bad.

i don't think i'm scared for tomorrow, but i'll probably start freaking out when i'm numbed. it's simple so i shouldn't worry. besides i'll say a prayer cuz we all no that can't hurt. can you say a prayer too? thanks!

other than that, i think i made one minor mistake. okay, it might be rather major, but i'm working on playing that down. otherwise just don't ask, cuz i don't want to have to answer. i'm told to stand my ground and gosh darnit i will, in the nicest way possible of course. :)

so i'm semi-addicted to this golfing game. it's not that bad, but i think i am. it's fun tho. i really want a hole in one.

side note: fran and i are going back and forth playing different songs and all the songs she seems to pick are sad love songs. haha, i don't know why. plus she almost just dropped her laptop.

oh and i'm searching for new music to listen to. my selection's boring me a bit these days, so if you have any suggestions go for it.

hmm...now i'm trying to dig out what else is on my mind. yes, once again, i can't remember. well i guess i'll stop now. i think that was a rather basic update. to complete the update would equal me saying that i really miss my dad. so yes, i really miss my dad. i keep telling myself one more week. ok, that is indeed a complete basic update. and by basic i mean no details required. :)

by the way, does this picture remind you of anyone?