sleep

i feel as though i have to explain myself everytime i decide to blog now. by explaining myself i mean that i need to give a reason to blog. it doesn't feel like something natural yet...some type of everyday activity like i used to. not that i used to blog everyday, but i blogged relatively often.

anyways, i've been finding myself very tired lately. hence, my middle of the weekend venture home. basically in my attempt to stay for the whole weekend, i failed. this is beside the point that my parents kept bugging frances about whether or not i was coming home. this was me feeling exhausted. i could only imagine how some people feel when they go entire months with limited amounts of sleep. but, yes...i went home because somewhere in the back of my mind i have this idea that at home i get the best rest ever. and for the most part it's true. although last night wasn't the best sleep ever, it was a lot more restful than the past week or so.

remember those bad dreams i had mentioned in my last blog. well, yes that is the reason why i've been so sleepy. normally i have dreams, and yes...they make me tired when i wake up, but the bad dreams are extra draining. basically i would sleep, but i wouldn't sleep well or i would wake up multiple times throughout the night. one night last week i even attempted going to sleep extra early, but that didn't do much. i don't know what's bogging me down, but it's deeply hindering my sleeping abilities. i speak of my sleeping abilities as if it's a super hero power, which it really is. :D maybe some type of kryptonite has seeped into my life hence the weakening of my power.

so, i'm trying to imagine one day being a parent who never ever really sleeps well. it's one thing to not sleep now because you wanna hang out or because of work or school, but it's a whole different story when on top of the fact that you work and might even have school, you don't sleep because your daughter had a nightmare and they woke you up in the middle of the night, or you have to take your kid to school "early" in the morning, or help them with a project that they procrastinated on just like you did when you were young. it's a difficult thought. i look back to when i was a kid and realize how little sleep my parents got, but not necessarily for the reasons listed above. i guess it's something you truly have to experience for yourself. i just figure for now since i have the "time" to sleep, i might as well take advantage of it. i guess the gist of what i'm saying is sleep is important and i need to find out why i haven't been sleeping well. i need to uncover my kryptonite.

hmm...this is going to be a tricky task.

speaking of sleep...it's kinda late. so wish me luck as i try to get some restful sleep...cuz i gotta be ready for those finals coming up. gotta be in the best condition ever to get some effective studying done. good night...and instead of sweet dreams, how about no dreams at all. now that, would be a "good" night. =)