why the warm weather?

it's october and it's pretty darn warm. okay, more like hot. stayed inside most of the day, but that didn't protect me from the heat. nor did it protect me from all the allergens outside. perhaps it was the open windows that allowed the pollen to strike my nose. shoot, i don't even know if it was pollen...all i know is that i was sneezing up a storm earlier today. okay, not really sneezing, more like sniffling. you know those times when you're trying to write and everytime you face downward towards the paper, you find yourself sniffling about 10 times faster than you were when your head was up. i guess that's how the phrase "keep your head up" relates to me. the phrase is used as more of a safety for my paper rather than for my emotional standing.

anyways, i don't mean to sound insensitive or anything, but damn the world is sensitive. maybe once upon a time i was too, but that same world changed me. and i'm not saying it's suppose to change you too. we all definitely deal differently. and that's when being understanding comes in. so at any rate, i'll try to see things from your perspective and i desperately hope that you will do the same.

so it's week 1 and i haven't gotten around to studying. and your thinking, week 1...you don't need to study yet. well, you see...i do. today, i finally tried studying. it was tough with the allergies and all, but i at least read the lab for this week. i just need to finish my prelab. hopefully this weekend i can catch up on some other readings. i shall see. i'm the type of person who can't multi-task very well. when it comes to multiple assignments, readings, and just plain old errands, i find that my brain becomes very scattered in an unproductive way. this also explains why i'm blogging right now instead of finishing my prelab. call it a refocusing moment. frances always told me to do that when i was younger. she told me to stop and refocus. eventually, i discovered that my cure was to stop everything i was doing and thinking. then, i needed to tell myself to work through things one step at a time and try really hard to block out all other worries. it works most of the time, but today...it's been a little tricky. oh and another great refocusing activity for me is juggling. however i currently did not bring any of my juggling balls to irvine and i don't want to use my fruits.

well, that's all i have for the now. good day.